This is mostly because it's fun, or at least I thought that was the reason why. Now I am a scientist at heart and I think I may have stumbled upon my reason for taking up the pen! Well it's a wireless keyboard that I "write" with but it doesn't quite have the same ring to it that pen does ;-)
I've always marvelled at people who knew exactly what they wanted to do in life. Artists, musicians, actors, comedians etc.are the examples that spring to mind. These folk love what they do and have pursued it. I never really loved doing anything that much that I would go to any length to pursue it. Well I kinda love working out but my body breaks whenever I pursue that with any vigour, so probs not for me.
The whole regardless of how much you work at/do this particular thing you don't get sick of it. I was and am completely mystified by the whole concept. I've never been able to sit and do the same thing day in day out without getting fantastically bored. Doesn't matter what it is, complex or simple, once I've "mastered" it there will come a time when I just want to leave it behind.
Thinking back I do realise that whatever I was doing was specific. That is say that it was limited in a way, boundaries etc. Am I making sense? For example particular mathematical techniques were taught to us in order to solver certain problems. The wider application and underpinning were usually left out, we were taught proofs but these were just routines that we memorised to score easy marks in exams. It never really meant anything to me is what I think I'm getting at. It was all something we did so we could take the next step.
For me the route that was laid out was:
- A levels
- University
- Job
- Marriage
- Kids
- Grandkids
- Death
It didn't work out and in I failed the second year in dramatic style. The plan had already started to unravel when I messed up my A levels and now with 2 years of wasted engineering behind me you think I'd get the message that this really isn't the way to go. But noooo I found a degree in accountancy and finance that seemed interesting. I really didn't give it too much thought. I must have still been in mindset that you have to have a degree in order to progress.
Sort of like when you need a certain number of kills, gems, coins etc before you can unlock the next power up in a game. Been playing a lot of Metal Gear Rising recently and you can upgrade your combat gear with points you collect whilst kicking ass in the game.
Upon completion of my degree I entered a wasteland of odd jobs with intermittent unemployment. Did lots of interesting stuff but couldn't get that job I "had" to have. In late 2012 I got a break and landed my current job. Lotsa shtuff about that here so I won't go on about it, for risk of repeating myself.
By staring at what has been my life up until this point I can see it as a set of accomplishments that is meant to , ultimately, lead to happiness.
Why A levels? To get into Uni
Why Uni? To get a good job
Why a good job? Security + "you got to have a J.O.B. if you want to be with me" :-P
You get the idea right?
Progression leading to...I don't know. Well I do know, death of course! I feel like I got sidetracked, what was I mulling over? Ah yes why I'm incessantly writing! It's a test to destruction. The idea is that if writing is something I love then I shouldn't get sick of it regardless of how much I do. Or that's a rationalisation I've come up with as my logical mind can't quite get a grip on being so fond of something.
Sorry to leave you hanging but I'll come back to it I promise!
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