Listen closely, why have I bothered to put this here?
This blog started as a bit of an ego trip The Life and Days of Ron G: Superstar but owing to the guy in the picture I usually end up writing up his weekly shenanigans. He is a bit a show stealer! The master of disaster who last week lost his key shows up Monday morning wearing the same shirt he has worn for the past two days. James is winding up to give him hell but is quickly cut off by Mark. He pre-emptively blurts out "All my other shirts and in the wash! My mum washed this one at the weekend."Then there is the story of this bobby dazzler of a pic. Now one of the businesses in our office, CMNC, updated their site to include us lot. You have see it all here. The pics were taken of a lovely warm day, the only issue was that the sun was wayyyyy too intense and there is an inordinate amount of foliage in the background. It was too much for Mark to take. Chin shadow...
Once Mark makes his millions, one of his five things to do before he dies, I would happily be his ghost writer. This lads memoirs would likely be a full time job! The five on his list were:
- Volunteer in Africa
- Own an Audi
- Become a millionaire - donate quite a bit to charity
- Explore the world -go to Vegas on the casinos
- Marry Mila Kunis, Beyonce, Rihanna or Kimberley Wyatt - not picky as long as it's one of them!
My five I hear you cry! Well when I first posted it I came up with
- Climb a mountain
- Play with a bear cub
- Learn to sing
- See as many countries as possible
- Talk to a shaman
Christian, the all purpose handyman, was in today. Not sure why but that's beside the point as he brought his dog with him, Arthur! He's a choc lab who invaded the office and caused a very welcome disruption on an exceptionally hot day. Reminds me of the time Mandy brought her dog into the office :D I would bring my dog in but he sheds at a rate that would coat any room in a liberal layer of yellow labrador fur in a matter of moments. Also he's old so he'd just huff, puff and sleep all day, living the dream.
The first two days were spent racing to reach call targets. This was a race between myself and Swapnal, one I was winning :D As cunning as young Swapnal is, my extra four years have taught me a trick or two :P It would appear we've got something of a (I started writing something and got distracted by something, likely sleep. DAMN YOU SLEEP! Whilst totally necessary and rather pleasant it does get in the way of me doing stuff. :-/)
Our marketing genius is heading back from whence he came, a sister company. Now I first got to know Paul on a trip up to Rock Farm Dairy, to have a chat with some schools about pouches. Funnily enough I drove to a school today, storyboard in hand. The same day after my initial excursion to Rock Farm was our first official work night out! The date, the date, the date 1st of March? It was before Eleanor's birthday, 21st of March?
Hilarious number plates I saw on my five hour journey back, they were on a Maserati, Jaguar, Porsche, Astin and Bentley! Incidentally the last delivery I did with Swapnal we witnesses a man in a blue Bentley continental grooving out to the Radio 1 mix tape!
HAM S0N - The son of Ham
BRSIANA - I read this as BrisAna - bris!
AI FTD - AI - obv amd FTD - The heir to the thunder god's throne it is of course Flying Thunder Dog!
GE OAD - Geode like the crystaline structure or the amazing monster in your pocket that is Geodude! :D
In life I've faced down gangs, fought off large snakes, dealt with massive spiders, endured storms, survived crashes and I even managed to tell a girl I liked her. These experiences coupled with my tendency to over think/analyse everything made me think I had fathomed the depths of fear. But only now do I realise that you don't know fear until you've approached a bee hive at dusk, dressed only in rugby shorts and armed with nest killing powder.
All is silent so I boldly administer the powder to the entrance of the hive, as per the instructions on the bottle. Feeling cocky I let this thought form "take that insectoid collective!" Then the buzzing starts...narrowly quash a girlish scream, I muster what courage I have remaining and dose the area with more powder. The sound does not stop, instead of waiting for the inevitable angry outpouring I swiftly bound indoors and forget about it till morning!
I've tried poisonous foam, powder, adhesive and smoking embers. I need to find a way to produce some embers that will smoke for hours to scare these badboys off. Or I could always locate a local bee keeper, I'm sure they'd be only too happy to relocate these beasties.
Whilst driving on Friday, 7 hours on the road! Friday traffic is a nightmare! I was listening to the radio and Sara Cox had vampire weekend in the live lounge. I know nothing about the band but after some quizzing about falafel, cats and finding out what a flistle is I warmed to them.
Vampire weekend - Live lounge - Blurred lines - Listen closely around 1:26...
On Saturday I drove up to Lincoln and saw a bit of road I'd never driven down. A1500 amazing! Go drive it now and thank me later folks. I was heading to an old family friends house to help out with the prep of the accounts for a charity. Greeted by his wife and regaled with tales of their granddaughters. I've met the elder one but not the younger, apparently fearless, fantastic! We get to work and sort the accounts in record time. He also goes over the finer points of politics, ridiculous stuff that blows my mind. I now know just how naive I am to the workings of orgs. Also you know you've been to a Sri Lankan household when you leave with a bag of mangoes :-D
Heading back home so I can do some faffing about before heading to Heathrow to grab my mother and brother after their holiday. I think I fell asleep, bits of time are missing. I was also convinced someone had spiked my coffee that morning, tasted oddly of vodka! I've got the address of a local Mcdonanlds as well so I can grab some dinner before I head to the airport.
Man Mcdonalds sucks! The last time I went was after a 3 hour lettering marathon. Wasn't blown away that time either but the mind tends to dull the underwhelming nature of tings. I have a BCO and it is bland, dry bleurgh! After some time I swing over to the airport, park up and get to Arrivals. Now I am amped up on low-cal Monster. I can't sit still so I prowl around and realise I'm likely to raise alarm. I'm quite stocky, bearded, asian and I look like I am psyching my self up! So I buy a paper and sit down. Turns out this was a mistake, I knew the flight had landed but I thought that the bags would take forever to arrive.
Whilst I was sat down round the corner my family emerged and went in the opposite direction to where I was. X-O So we wasted about an hour! Suffice to say my mother was fuming, mostly at the situation, thank the gods for that one. Told tales of a "sweet" girl who threw up on the plane. Also mum is shattered but insists on trying to stay awake so I don't fall asleep. I am a bit of a stamina monster with regards to staying awake. 72 hours straight once, never again mind, well maybe if I meet the right crazy folks.
That's all for this week, now I did write a flashback to include but I've chopped it out and stuck it elsewhere. Made more sense :D
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