Hot sauce.

Read it in the voice of Harley Morenstein AKA Sauce-boss! Back to the matter in hand, mediocre hot sauce. I'm not a connoisseur, apparently I have no idea how to spell the word connoisseur! Anyway I am not one, I am but a fan of spicy liquids. Where does this perverse tendency burst forth from? I hear you whisper. Perhaps from my lineage...as previously mentioned I am descended from a race of volcano dwelling tree folks. Ah we would feast upon the magma or lava, there is a difference despite the words being  used interchangeably, regularly, in day to day speech. And I know what you're thinking how do tree folk survive in the extreme heat of their chosen volcano habitat? Well we would clad ourselves in confidence thus allowing us to do pretty much anything. I'm obviously being ridiculous as confidence does not give you the ability to do anything, competence does.

It's liquid rock!

Yeah so back to the spicy not so great sauce. I was having a casual shop in Sainsburys for my weekly supplies. My diet consists of mainly fruit and veg with a little bread/pasta/rice for good measure. There was a time when I viewed carbohydrates as the bane of my existence. I don't remember the last time I had sugar, urgh I've become one of those guys! I spot a hot sauce for sale in the reduced produce bit, £1.50 or thereabouts. I am a fan and owing to my phaseleresque tendency to try things I've never tried before, I convince myself to pop it in my trolley. I say convince I basically saw it and immediately put it in my trolley. This tendency was mentioned before, here. Shop done and I'm home time to workout and onwards to lunch! Now I decide to douse my salad in the new hot sauce. It's terrible, it's like ketchup without a kick. I despair before remembering I have an ingredient that adds heat without adding flavour...1,000,000 scoville concentrated pepper extract!

See the neck of the bottle?

Now that blackness is pretty much the colour that the extract is. Well I suppose it's more of a deep, dark red. I add a drop or two and shake the bottle with vigour. I am clad in confidence, based on the previous underwhelming experience of the sauce. It was misplaced I end up having to wash it off several pieces as my mouth, lips, eyes etc. can take nay more!

That's the little label that came with the bottle you can purchase it here if you'd really like. Looks like it was a originally a restaurant that sells a signature sauce.

I should explain the choice of video at the beginning. I love this song! It's upbeat but has an underlying melancholic quality.

I had heard this on MTV many, many years ago and forgotten the name of the song. During a chance MSN conversation with a lovely young lady named Georgia, sweet Georgia, I asked for a song suggestion. She insisted I listen to Hi Tack - Say Say Say. I ignored her suggestion and wandered off into the aether of the internet. Days, perhaps weeks, passed and I asked for another song suggestion. She suggested the same song. This time I found it and was pleasantly surprised! Managed to backtrack and find the original from Georgia's suggestion. Some background on Georgia: Crazy mad swimming skills...that's all I know about Georgia! Just looked her up and she's an ecologist at some kind of environmental concern. Environmental it's the worst kind of mental. Not really the worst kind of mental just a joke I repeat every time I hear, see or smell any word ending in mental. For example fundamental, experimental, instrumental. Oh and I've just remembered that Linda McCartney is in it as well! I had no idea who she was and now I know much more.

I was summoned to a meeting this past weekend. Now I've been involved in any number of projects that never really got off the ground. But this one actually looks like it might. There was a lot of talk of what we'd need. I was extremely out of my depth. I rarely write something with a focus. I let my mind loose and this blog with it's soul destroying word count is the result. But having a crack at fiction has been fun thus far. I get carried away very easily. So I've written a few thousand words already but it was fun! And I suppose that's the point. I write because it's fun :-D Oh and I may have to cease my unceasing effusion of cool stuff I saw online. The meeting descended into a round of subtledildo. Search #subtledildo to see what all the fuss is about.

Incidentally I was reminded of a tale from my final year at university. I may return one day, actually I've been back every year since for one reason or other. Anyway a lovely red haired lady, we first met in the Somerset countryside. I had just skinned my knee prior to a four day process that involved a lot of kneeling. I have the best luck...in the world! She had posted a picture of her alarm clock in her work handbag.  Reminds me of the time I popped off to purchase a pillow in between lectures. My brother had specifically requested a memory foam pillow for his 16th, peculiarity clearly runs in the family. I arrive at the last lecture of the day with a big bag full of pillow. Oddly enough I was notorious for dozing off in the odd lecture and now I'd arrived prepared with my new fancy pillow! Click here to reminisce about my redheadedness

Here's a vid of a blacksmith making Thor's hammer!